Dear Younger Me - Coach Kristopeit (Bot9 #299)
Dear Young Ben:
Hello young man! This is your 52-year-old self in the year 2020. Despite what Doc Brown and the flux capacitor are making seem possible, in the future we do not have flying cars. However, Denver now has a major league baseball team, the Colorado Rockies, and we all carry a cell phone with us wherever we go. I could explain MLB’s expansion, but not the phone thing.
Right now, you’re a student at Colorado State University, struggling with school, your faith and wondering what’s going on. How I wish I could send you a six-pack of perspective, and the maturity we currently enjoy. You can’t understand it now because you think being 20 is the bomb, but you’re going to love the peace, the freedom, the places you’ll go, the people you’ll meet, and most importantly, the relationships that will define your life. Remember that word: relationships.
Sports, specifically baseball, has been the love of your life. Athletically, there’s been very little failure in your life. You’re a moderately gifted athlete – good enough to play baseball at CSU. But not MLB good. Not draftable good. Sorry to burst your bubble but through your success and passion to play and compete, you’ve allowed sports to define you. Beyond that, school isn’t providing any semblance of a road map to the future. Mom and Dad love the heck out of you, but never really taught you how to study. That’s why school is tough. Not because you’re not smart, but because you’re not playing the game of school. This will work itself out, trust me.
Being 20 is tough. You look like an adult, but you have no idea how to BE an adult. You’re brand new at it! You’re like an Infant Adult – you can be temperamental, irresponsible, fall down, cry, laugh until you cry again, be amazed by new experiences, feel unexplained joy and sleep till the cows come home! But with this age comes the responsibility to plan for the future. Wife, family, career, home? As you’re currently stumbling and bumbling around in Ft. Collins, the God of the universe and your Creator has already laid the foundation on which to build that future. You know this one from Jeremiah 29:11 “For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord, plans for a future, and for good….” You learned that in Sunday school in the basement of Mission Hills. Well, it’s true.
Starting with your parents and three sisters who love you, the road ahead will be paved with, and built on relationships. On September 15, 1976 you recited the Sinners Prayer and accepted Christ as your savior as Mom and Dad looked on proudly. God’s been in your heart ever since, through good times and bad, like Mom and Dad, loving you unconditionally. Now is the time to start digging into that relationship with the Lord. I want you to do the following everyday – pray, thank God for all things, ask for forgiveness, read your Bible, study, memorize and meditate on the Word. Let it soak in like Colorado sunshine until it oozes through veins! Live on it and let the world know you’re a believer. Your personal relationship with Jesus Christ – your walk, your talk, your prayers will be the single most important decision and relationship you will make in your lifetime. Make no mistake, it’s a lifelong journey bud. And one other thing; quit trying to be perfect all the time. Jesus lived the perfect life because we can’t. He forgives you, so get over yourself and get out of your own way!
Relationships will play a huge role in defining your careers. That’s right, you’ll have more than one. I’ll start with the second one. Without realizing it your second career started on an innocent summer day when you were 10 years old – the day you mowed the lawn for the first time. You know how much you still love mowing a beautiful lawn, trying to create perfect stripes like Augusta’s fairways and the satisfaction it brings? That passion, coupled with a still hibernating entrepreneurial spirit, will result in a successful business built on relationships. Meadowlark Lawns will thrive because of the friendships, the neighbors, the family, the colleagues from the golf business (‘golf business’ - what?), and your God given ability to labor tirelessly under a hot sun. Check out Thessalonians 4:11, “Make it your ambition to lead a quiet life, to mind your own business and to work with your hands, just as we told you, so that your daily life may win the respect of outsiders, and so that you will not be dependent on anybody.” Meadowlark Lawns will be short-lived, but will be impactful for you, your family and those you serve.
Your first career, like the second, will be unexpected. God has something super-duper cool cooked up, and once again, it starts with relationships. The game of golf will soon become your new sport and passion, your new focus and addiction. So much so you’ll get into the business. How? Dad will call his friend MJ, who calls his friend Jay, who calls his friend Bob who then calls you and asks, “Hey Ben, wanna work in Florida?” And so begins a 20 year journey working as a club professional around the country. To this day, at age 52, the relationships made with the men and women who came in and out of your life still mean more than any round of golf you will ever play. And you’ll have some real doozies playing with the likes of a movie star, a Grammy winner, an Olympian, many professional athletes and a Pulitzer Prize winner. You might even meet a future US President one day. Just saying kid, be ready, because God does things just to give us a thrill sometimes! He’ll take your athletic ability, throw in a heaping tablespoon of relationships, sprinkle in a little razzle-dazzle and BOOM! You got yourself a little career where you can earn a living, cultivate lifelong friendships and allow God to groom your heart for service. Enjoy it kid – golf is fun!
Finally, a few years from now you’re going to meet a woman who will change your world. Where is she now you ask? New York. Go figure - it’s always the last place you look. Am I right? Anyway, for now you need to stay patient and faithful. Like you she’s a believer and comes from a family built on love, faith, hard work and laughter. You’ll find her to be beautiful, funny, intelligent, wise beyond her years, independent and unimaginably kind. All that you think you know about relationships with a girlfriend or a wife is bubkis! Hey sorry dude, but you’re pretty shallow when it comes to this stuff. There’s a little more to a meaningful relationship with a woman than big hair and stone washed jeans. It won’t be all frozen ropes and no hitters – good marriages are hard work – but this blessing will knock your socks off.
Proverbs 31 portrays ‘The Wife of Noble Character.’ Read it now giving special attention to verses 26-30, which go like this:
“She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue,
She watches over the affairs of her household, and does not eat the bread of idleness,
Her children arise and call her blessed, her husband also, and he praises her,
Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all,
Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised…”
Second only in importance to your personal relationship with Jesus will be the one with your wife and children. It won’t be perfect, but man oh man, it’ll be fulfilling. I’m telling you right now that at the end of the day when you’ve played all your cards, ran your last mile and given all you’ve got, it won’t be money, or the house, the cars, the vacations taken or status and position that bring peace and joy, but the simple confidence that comes from knowing you’re surrounded by those you love, and love you right back.
“For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Romans 8: 38-39
Young Ben, God created you to be in relationship with Him, and He loves you more than you know. That’s it bud….except for all the other stuff you’ll have to figure out on your own.
Ben Kristopeit, Assistant Coach, Valor Christian High School